#and i think it's rude no one made a gif set of it aka someone with actual talent but here we are
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Somedays you just wanna get comforted by fictional characters over your issues... Today is one of those days for me so can I request Chamber, Killjoy, Cypher, Fade, Omen, and Skye comforting their chubby S/O headcanons? Like normally their S/O can handle or ignore comments about their body, but one more rude "You look pregnant" breaks them. Thank you ~BC
Who ever is being a dick to you can meet my hands, people really need to mind they damn business and shut the fuck up.
Chamber is the king of body positivity, he's a fan of all body types and will worship you REGARDLESS of what you look like. If the event happened in front of him he would go on the defensive, immediately confronting the commenter with such questions as: "What makes you think you can make a comment at that towards someone? Did your mother not raise you correctly? Have you never seen another human before?" and would basically trap them and force them to apologize to you, insulting them for being rude before sending them on their way. Would take you home right away and absolutely shower you in affection, pampering you thoroughly. If you wanted anything he would go out and get it or have it delivered. The entire rest of the day will just be him reinforcing you are absolutely perfect and that its okay to cry, not everyone can be strong all the time and you certainly shouldn't have to be subject to those types of comments all the time. Would listen to you vent or ramble as much as you desire, peppering any problem spots with kisses as he compliments you. Chamber is the partner that goes rabid the moment his love is insulted and sometimes nearly breaks his composed image over it.
Killjoy is more passive and wont confront someone but would openly and VERY loudly say, "That was so rude, what kind of idiot says something like that? They must have issues with their own confidence if they are ragging on others in public." aka doesn't say it to their face but very loudly talks shit about them before excusing you two to somewhere safer. She absolutely loves her partners chub, its one of her favorite things so when others are assholes about it she gets annoyed to say the least. Treats you to video games and even encourages you to wear your favorite clothes around to make you feel better, commenting on how good you look and awing over your chub. Certainly has a roasting session over the person who made the comment to cheer you up, makes the promise to step in more to keep you from having to deal with people being insensitive.
Klara HATES to see you cry so she really wants to do her best to cheer you up despite not being the best with emotions or people. Would really want to try to talk about how you feel so she can have a better understanding but wont push you if its touchy. Would also entirely hit on you more openly and more frequently, your body is loved and perfect and she will make the very clear.
Cypher is a passive aggressive little shit so the moment you came home crying he was asking you a million questions to figure out who did this. Holds you while you cry and vent, jotting down all the information about the event he could to hunt that person down later. Gets you set up with your favorite shows, food, and comfort items while he goes to handle a "business call" aka hunt down this persons social media and ruin their image. Does run a full check to see if this person does this a lot, if they have any other nasty traits or opinions he can pin point, eventually digs up all he can then emails it to their employer as a concerned customer/business partner. Wouldn't tell you about what he did but would return and start going off about how perfect you are and how much he loves your body, might get a bit lewd as he describes all the bits he likes but thats just him being specific.
Cypher is the type of guy that regardless of how you look or what people think you are his entire world. He would do what ever it takes to make sure those who treat you poorly get the karma they deserve while making sure your self image stays as high as he holds you.
While Chamber is the king of body positivity Fade is the queen. How her powers work lets her be very honed in when something is bothering you or when you're self conscious so she's aware the moment someone has upset you. Without a word removes you from the situation to a more isolated location if not directly home, she doesn't want you to have to feel even worse over crying in front of people. Makes sure prowler gives that person hell for a while, if you want to poke at peoples insecurities then you certainly can deal with yours being poked at. Uses alot of logic/reasoning to help calm you down, even revealing some of the persons fears to make you feel better that it wasn't you that was the issue its them. Doesn't stop calling you beautiful/handsome/gorgeous what ever term you most favor it never stops.
Fade really understands how people feel at their core so she's one of the best equipped to squash those bad feelings and replace them with better ones.
Shadow boy is very confused as to why someone would care so much about your weight to make a degrading comment, seeing someone's weight as an insignificant detail when it comes to judging people. Gets rightfully upset once he sees you crying, considers ending the person on the spot but Sage would be disappointed in him so he just teleports you away to somewhere safe. He may be far from the human he used to be but he knows how hurtful those words are, making sure you know that regardless of other peoples words it doesn't change how you are or mean you are any less. Focuses on reinforcing your own personal value as well as stressing that the stranger knows nothing, noting everyone at Valorant thinks you look amazing as you are. Honestly super confused over how you even look pregnant and may ask the stranger what they mean by that, basically making them explain the insult until they cant anymore and embarrasse themselves. Omen, despite being a confused noodle, would do his best to make sure you know your worth is not set in your weight or how people view you. Would also cite how well you usually handle things being a sign that you're stronger than the person making the comment and that crying isn't a bad thing since you usually have to deal with so much.
Skye
Muscle wife is really understanding but would not seek any conflict, removing you from the situation and comforting you as best she can. She knows that some people prefer buff people like herself but she also knows not everyone can be that way and shouldn't be shamed for it. Skye absolutely loves your chub and worships your body much like Killjoy does. She things all bodies are beautiful in their own way so what if you work out a lot or dont, doesn't make a difference to her. Offers to take you on a trip with her just the two of you so she can show you that person was entirely in the wrong to say something like that aka body worship but an entire vacation. Skye certainly is in the same boat with Omen when it comes to not understanding why people feel so entitled to comment on others bodies but likes to disprove them and make you feel valid and worthy. She also does get pretty upset when you cry and would probably make a point to be overly affectionate to you when that persons around, making it clear that you aren't undefended if they want to fuck around and find out again.
#chamber valorant#chamber x reader#valorant x reader#cypher valorant#valorant headcanons#cypher x reader#omen valorant#omen x reader#skye valorant#skye x reader#killjoy valorant#killjoy x reader#fade x reader#fade valorant#BC
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Weekend Drabble #10 (Henry x Reader)
A/N: I’m not completely satisfied with this one but I chose to post anyway because most of the time I’m too hard on myself so I’ll let you all be the judge of it.
Request: “And then my soul saw you and it kind of went, ‘Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you.” for @agniavateira
Warnings: overuse of clichés?
“Do you believe in love at first sight?”
You knew the man who was speaking to you of course. Who didn’t know Henry Cavill, aka Superman? The man who was about to starr in the film adaptation of your book. But his words caught you off guard and you didn’t know how to reply to that except stare in confusion.
“Sorry, that was rude of me,” he started again with a small, awkward chuckle. “Hi, I’m Henry,” he offered a hand. “Huge fan.”
It was only then you realized that he wasn’t actually asking you if you believed in love at first sight but quoting opening line of your book and it was your turn to chuckle awkwardly as you shook his hand.
“Likewise,” you said as he took a seat in front of you. “But to answer your question, I don’t actually.”
He looked surprised at your statement, one eyebrow rising slightly as he watched you with those ocean blue eyes and you never fully understood the idea of one’s beauty taking your breath away until you set your eyes on Henry.
It was something deeper than just his sculpted features and perfectly proportional face that made you consider that if you tried to apply the golden ratio to his face, it would be a perfect match. Yet, there was something more about it than just his looks. It was this sort of warm welcome that he exulded that made you feel so perfectly at ease and your stomach do a couple of accobatic flips.
“Really? but you write it so well and in such a relatable way…” he rested his chin on his hand, watching you with such deep interest that you felt captivated. “And without making it a cliché, which is rare and pretty much why I accepted this role.”
“The wonders of literature,” you replied, taking a sip of your coffee and wondering if the heat you felt on your cheeks were due to your beverage or the intensity of his stare. “We don’t have to actually experience something to write about it.”
“Ahh…” Henry clicked his tongue, his face lighting up in such way that one would think he found the answer to the most fascinating mystery in the planet. “So you’re one of those people.”
“What people?”
“The ones that only believed something when it happens to them.”
“Guilty,” you chuckled, watching the swirling liquid in your cup because looking at Henry was proving to be a lot like looking at the sun: a gorgeous sight but better taken in small dosages.
“Well,” he started, getting up with a sort of secretive smile that honed into your inquisitive side. “I’ll look forward to prove you wrong, because when I read your book it almost felt like I was getting a glimpse of your heart and soul and I realized that you might be someone I’ve been searching for a long time, but all in due time. See you tomorrow.”
With those words, Henry got to his feet and left you to wonder what had happened and what exactly he meant by that.
—
If you enjoyed this work, please consider reblogging and/or commenting please. Feedback gives life to us writers!
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can we do it? - billy/four - chapter 7
sorry for the long delay of chapter 7,, i think this may end at 8 or 9 but i’ll try to get to 10
school is really getting hard at the moment and it’s only the end of the second week so i really hope you guys bear with me on everything and i still have another ben request to write so i’m sorry to whoever sent that i am working on it
i also would like it if you guys maybe send in some feedback on the stuff i write because i am doing this for free and i know that sounds rude but i am taking time out of my day and night for you guys to read everything
summary: one team, seven people, two lovers, things, are about to get crazy and zero and four don’t know if they can manage do it
masterlist
# of words: 2,708
warnings: angst, drama,
taglist
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After what happened with the mission to get Murat, everyone revealing their names after Billy almost died and Blaine saving him to Billy and Y/N getting lectured by One, everything was still going according to the revised plan. They needed to go to a few more locations before the final stage of the mission. When boarding the plane, they decided to actually sit next to each other rather than be sitting opposite from each other. Everyone knew that they loved each other and wished that nothing would happen to them seeing that they are the youngest in the group. They already lost one member and they didn’t need to lose another. That night when Billy and y/n were talking it felt like they were finally able to get everything that they wanted to say since they first met off their chests and they finally did.
Billy and y/n were quietly talking before Blaine announced that they were going to take off which caused her to grab his hand and squeeze it. She didn’t have problems with flying, she just didn’t like turbulence and this time she didn’t have to pretend to be okay and feel like her brain was about to explode. He noticed this and began to run his thumb over her hand reassuring her that it was alright and should pass over soon before giving a kiss on her head.
“It should pass over soon. Don’t worry.” he whispered in her ear
“So what was it like? I mean sneaking around and doing everything. Has it been like that since the beginning and you just said that you’ve been together since Vegas or?” Javier asked them curiously
“Well i’ve pretty much liked her since One recruited me, she was like behind him watching everything go down”
“When you came to the grounds you looked like you were about to shit yourself.” Camille mentioned as everyone started to giggle as Billy’s face turned red
“I mean he technically did almost kill me while she stood there doing nothing” he tried to argue as y/n gave a kiss on his cheek
“I’m sorry for not doing anything.” she told him while giving him a sincere look
“It’s okay, i forgive you. Besides, if we’re being honest, I only stayed because of you.” he confessed
The rest of the plane ride wasn’t too long seeing it was only going to be about 10 hours. They all caught up on some sleep but Billy couldn’t sleep at all and Y/N noticed it because he kept moving around and shifting in his seat. She began to become concerned for him thinking that it must’ve been that bad for him not to be able to sleep on a plane for a few hours. As he continued, she began to draw on his hands to make him relax--she soon felt him tense down and take even breaths rather than fast paced ones. Everyone looked at them and saw how perfect they were for each and how they kept each other grounded. It went on like that until they heard Blaine start talking again
“Hey, ghosts. This is Seven, AKA Blaine. We’re below radar, we’re entering Turgistan airspace. That gives us about four days until Day of the Dead.”
As they stepped off the plane, they got ready to go undercover to gather at least a few more pieces of data before the next few days happened. Y/N took a look around and didn’t realize as to how beautiful everything looked and didn’t understand why a place like that had to have it run by someone so awful.
They all split up into three teams. Two and Three; Zero, Four, and Five; Seven and One. all in different spaces and Murat with One and Seven in the backseat of one of the cars they stole, complaining.
“How’s it going on your guys’ end?” Y/N asked they sneaked into the facility up in the Turgistan mountains
“Our new number Zero, apparently, is doing great and his brother is going to cut off his head.” One told them sarcastically
“Bomb’s are set” Camille said quietly looking around to see if anyone saw them set it up while praying
“I wonder how many people you have to kill just to get a statue of yourself.” Javier asked looking at the statue at Rovach
“Okay, we’re at the TV relay.” Billy told them then getting the bolt cutters out
“Hey, you okay? You don’t always have to pretend you’re okay all the time.” Y/N asked whispering the last part to him as he just ignored her as he just cut the chain holding the fences together
“He’s in” Amelia said
Y/N felt like everything she and Billy had talked about and being open with each other over the past couple days had just been thrown out the window and as if they didn’t tell each other they would always be honest with how they felt and to never ignore them. As they entered Amelia and Y/N had gone through another side while Billy had climbed up the satellites to place the inverters.
“Hey, what’s wrong with you two? You seemed fine on the plane and now he’s not talking to you unless it’s for this.” Amelia had asked concerned
“I’m not sure. Something’s wrong but i know if i ask him he’s going to snap. Even after we talked about how we should always be open with how we’re feeling.” Y/N told her as she got out her laptop and set everything up for the two of them.
If Amelia was being honest herself, she was worried for the both of them, but also was because she had also liked billy. She knew it was wrong because Y/N and Billy had been together for a bit now but still she couldn’t help but feel something for him. The night before when they had gone to their separate rooms, she had wanted to talk to them. When they started talking, she started to move closer and closer to the point where their lips almost touched. Of course, they didn’t want to tell Y/N because he didn’t want to cause a rift in the team especially after that they proved to One that they were able to date while being in the team and truly care about each other. Y/N feels as if it’s something going on between them because of how they were both acting but all she could do was brush off the feeling and continued on with the mission. All they had to do was disable the security at Rovach’s palace so they were able to get on to his yacht.
1 day till Day of the Dead
One and Y/N had figured out a way to do that by having an unannounced visit to his state run power generator One and Blaine were going to be the ones who were going to go undercover to try and get inside to overrun it while Y/N stayed behind with Amelia to help them.
“All right, guy. You’re clear to the gate.” she told them
“Are you sure this is going to work?” Amelia asked
“Well, you never underestimate the power of a very nice suit. It always works. Seven, remember they don’t like Americans” One told them
“Okay everything’s looking good. They’re in” Y/N mentioned looking at the monitors
There was a moment of silence as they went in and Y/N thought it would be a good time to ask Amelia what was going on between the three of them as they had a bit of time in between.
“Hey, do you know what’s wrong with Billy? He’s been acting weird since the plane ride yesterday and he won’t talk to me when I ask him about it. He always just brushes me off.” she asked with her voice somewhat shaky. Amelia didn’t know how to answer her and wanted to tell the truth but she didn’t and made something up
“Maybe he’s still shocked over what happened with the water? I mean i’m not a psychiatric doctor but I do know that kind of stuff can last for a long time” she told her as her leg started to shake
“Maybe, i mean we told each other we would always be honest and I don’t want to get hurt again and I want to trust him that he can take care of himself.” Y/N told her looking back on the monitor
“He’ll come around, don’t worry about it too much.” Amelia smiled at her as she was going to talk back before they heard One start to talk in a fake accent
“Manchester.” he said in the worst Scottish accent they have all heard before
“Manchester and Farquarson. We’ve got a website, look it up. Inspection is our business. That’s the slogan.” He finished
“And your name again?” the front desk guy asked
“My name is Mr. Worthington, -and this is my associate, Mr. Ferijips--” One said
“Ferjelpo” Blaine interrupted in another one of the worst fake accents the two women have heard before as they put their heads in their heads
“Surjepo-- and he’s from--” “Turgistan.”
“Do you want soup?”
“Got any booze in there?” One asked
“I’m going to need booze just to forget this happened.” Y/N mumbled as Amelia agreed having to hear the two men
“Compliment his wife. There’s a picture” she quickly retracted back\
“Is that your wife over there?” One asked
“It’s my daughter.” the secretary said angrily slamming the thermos on the desk
“Oh shit.”
“uh…”
“It’s hard living out here isn’t it? I mean, i have a family trying their best all over the world and they just can’t seem to listen when i tell them. Did she come out full grown? Faked me out there with the gray hair and the wrinkles- and the orthopedic shoes and-- ” One asked
“One what the fuck are you saying don’t say that shit” Y/N told him
“What do you want?” he asked
“An unannounced stress test would be one. Plants three through seven, they passed. And I have no doubt that you will, too. All right. The only failure was plant two. You know that was very-”
“Plant two failed?”
“--minor. Yes, so, you know Mr. Noor? We’re trying to keep his name out of it.”
“Noor is a fool”
Y/N couldn’t help but let her mind wander over to Amelia and the way she was acting, especially after she had asked her about what was going on with billy. Did she know something? Was she the cause of it? It wasn’t because of what happened in Hong Kong because she would know and has known him for a while now to understand the way he comes off. He pretends everything is fine, but really it’s not. She knew everything that has happened to him, all his arrests, knew everything he ever stole, how he was living, his girlfriends, the fact that only five people went to his funeral and three had left before it even finished, you name it. She quietly send him a separate message on the phones that they all use to keep in contact with asking if they could talk later when they were done
“Hey, can we talk later?”
“Yeah, sure what about?”
“I’ll tell you later. I love you.” she said hoping it’ll get something out of him--but it didn’t. She didn’t get a reaction from him at all and just left her on read. She knew she shouldn’t be upset over something like this but she couldn’t help but take it to heart. The last time she was in this situation she got her heart broken and didn’t leave her house for over her month--the only difference was this time she didn’t have any friends or family that she could turn to that she could trust without them saying “i told you so.”. All she had to do was suck it up and take it like an adult for this time and not act like a teenager. She was pulled out of her thoughts when Amelia started to shake her shoulder to ask for help with One and Blaine after they had managed to mess up the mission and did not know what to talk about.
“Hey, they need us, like right now.” she said as she rummaged through some documents they had with them to not leave a digital trail
“Noor’s dead. Say he’s dead” she told one
“No, he’s dead. He died” One said as Y/N saw that it was the wrong guy amelia mentioned
“One, no. That's the wrong guy. He’s alive. Fuck. You have to recover somehow. Do what you’re good at and bullshit something.” she said panicking
“Yeah. he was found with a belt...tied around his neck in an unfortunate masturbating accident. Ferocious masturbating accident. It was very sad.” he said
“One, shut the fuck up.” Amelia yelled into the mic
“What?” “Come on. We’ve all choked ourselves having a little choke, haven’t we?” One finished
“Oh my god. Now I’m really going to need booze to forget this all happened.” Y/N groaned
Somehow it worked and One and Blaine managed to get through security and inside. They were led inside to a satellite room where all the power was being transmitted so they could make sure everything was fine.
“This is our finest room. It transmits all state-run television and power to the palace.”
“It’s very efficient”
“Maybe Mr. Grace can mention it to Mr. Bashir.”
“I doubt it.”
“We got it Zero.” Blaine whispered
The two men continued to bullshit their way out of the situation as the women behind watched them. Javier was waiting for them onsite to pick them back to where they were staying. When they arrived she found Billy sitting on the steps outside of the small house. He didn’t notice her at first and continued to pick at his fingers. He soon stopped when he saw someone standing right in front of him and saw her clutching her bag. He nodded and got up and followed her to somewhere where they could talk in private.
“I really hate to do this, but what is going on?” she asked him
“What do you mean? Nothings wrong.” he told her furrowing his eyebrows
“You know what i mean.” she sighed before continuing
“I know you haven’t been honest with me lately. I don’t know if it’s from Hong Kong or something else, but just please tell me if you don’t love me anymore.” she told her tears already creeping up in her eyes
“Nothing’s going on. I promise you. Yeah, it’s from Hong Kong. I do love you. I really do.”
“Billy please.”
“Nothing is going on. God, you’re so fucking clingy. Maybe it’s a good thing i’m keeping something from you.” he yelled at her
Y/N couldn’t say anything but just stand there shocked. Did she do something wrong? She knew that she may have overstepped but she just wanted to make sure that everything was alright with him. It was just something she had to do; make sure people were okay and that they were taken care of before herself.
“God, you know maybe i should’ve just let Amelia kiss me. I shouldn’t have stepped away. At least she doesn’t ask me how i’m doing every two seconds.” he finished running his hand through his hand
“You know, this was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have gone out that night and I should've just let you. One was right. I was going to regret this.” Y/N told him, tears leaving her eyes as she felt her chest tighten more, turning back to go to the house.
Everyone overheard them fighting and looked over to Amelia where she felt easily as guilty for what just happened. When she got to the house, she couldn’t even look them in the eyes and just went to her room. Billy couldn’t help but yell at the sky and kick the dirt below him as tears streamed down his face.
#ben hardy#ben hardy imagine#ben hardy x reader#ben hardy x female reader#ben x reader#ben hardy x y/n#ben hardy x you#ben jones#ben jones x reader#ben hardy fanfic#ben hardy fanfiction#ben hardy fic#ben hardy angst#ben hardy smut#ben hardy fluff#ben hardy drabble#ben hardy blurb#billy!ben x reader#four!ben x reader#four x reader#four!6underground#6 underground#warren worthington iii#warren worthington imagine#warren worthington x reader#roger taylor imagine#roger taylor x reader#roger taylor#bohemian rhapsody#borhap
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Terms and Conditions of Friendship {JHS}
I wish I had it in me to apologise for this disgusting smut, but I just don’t. I just... don’t. Also I wrote so much I had to split it into two halves bc tumblr hates long posts sorry
Warnings: swearing (it’s me), fuckboy!BTS, sexual tension with like all of the members, a road trip with 7 rowdy men, slight exhibitionism, teensy bit of masturbation,smallest mention of thigh riding, intentional (but not obvious) orgasm denial, Jung Hoseok being rude aF, fratboy Bangtan shenanigans as per
Summary: 13 has always been an unlucky number. Always. It’s just... written into the laws of nature at this point. So it’s no surprise that when you hit the 13th month of your - ahem - dry spell, you do the one thing you swore you’d never do.
Part 2 || Masterlist
~^*^~
Just as you think you’ve successfully made it through the hallway, a voice calls your name and you audibly sigh and turn to the owner of said voice. Jungkook has his head peering around the door from, looking at you.
“Where ya going?” He inquires.
“To the bathroom...” you trail off, hoping that he doesn’t catch on to the very obvious need in your voice.
“Why did you sneak off?”
“Because I didn’t want to interrupt you guys. Enough interrogation I need to go.”
You ignore any more words coming from his mouth, as you’re already practically sprinting to the bathroom. Fuck Min Yoongi. God, you’d like to. Why he chose on having you sit on his lap during the movie, why he had to keep flexing his fucking thigh every time he so much as shuffled, why he had to keep a grip on your waist was beyond you and now you were all riled up. Well... technically, you’d been riled up for the last nine days and you were nearing insanity. You know that it was around the time that you are ovulating, so of course your body is craving a little more than usual but... this is a lot more than usual. This is tons more than usual. And hanging out with the Bangtan Fraternity is not helping your case.
No, it never helped your case. Because all seven members are hot. Yesterday, Namjoon had appeared in the kitchen shirtless and he’s been working out for the last five months and he’s got some real nice pecs and a faint but still obvious set of abs and- you inhaled your orange juice through your nose and Taehyung had a fit. He couldn’t stop laughing and you made Namjoon smirk because that fucker knew he’d struck a cord by coming in shirtless. Way to boost his ego.
A few days before that incident, you had slept over after a party and Seokjin had been getting it on with one of the sorority girls (you think her nae was Rose or something like that) and holy shit, hearing his grunts and moans sent you into a frenzy. You’d never really had a thing for Seokjin but it was hard to face him the next morning, that’s for sure.
Right now, though, you are close to calling a male prostitute or doing something because holy shit you hadn’t had sex in thirteen whole months. Your last rendezvous had been with Jackson Wang, your then boyfriend who had promptly dumped you just two days after. Something about needing space. Clearly he needed space to fuck that stupid Taeyeon or whatever her name is. Whatever. You’re totally over it.
Except you really miss sex. You really miss sex. To the point that you’re currently on your way to the bathroom to maybe get one orgasm out of the way so that you can focus on the rest of the movie. Of course, that doesn’t happen.
“Ey, [First], hurry up, I need to pee after.”
“Hoseok, there is a bathroom upstairs.” You grit your teeth, turning your head as you near the bathroom door.
“Yeah, exactly. This one is closer. So hurry up.”
He’s in a pair of grey material shorts and a black t-shirt and somehow he looks better than models on a runway. He’s looking at you with an accusatory gaze. Why are you being so feisty?
“Wait are you going for a shit-“
“No-“ you cut him off, “I’m not!”
“Good well hurry.”
So, you slam the bathroom door shut and stand there for a moment. You stare at yourself in the mirror and mutter to yourself in an attempt to cool your ever growing body temperature. Your eyes are blown wide and there’s a rosey hue to your cheeks. You look exactly how you feel and you know at least one of the members has caught on to what’s bothering you.
As you run a hand through your hair, the door knocks.
“Come on!”
Fucking Hoseok.
You tear the door open, giving him a glare.
“You didn’t flush.” He points out with a disgusted look.
“I didn’t do anything. You put me off.” Technically it isn’t a lie. Hoseok gives you a weird look and tugs you out of the room so that he can go in. He doesn’t even shut the door properly. Disgusting.
Why are you even friends with these disgusting frat boys? You do have to wonder. Your legs are starting to shake a little. You decide to sit down in the kitchen, opting you stay away from the room full of guys for a moment. You need to catch your breath. You hear the bathroom door shut and Hoseok whistles as he makes his way back to the living room. With him gone, you could totally just go back to the bathroom...
You’re seriously debating it. It’s so tempting and Yoongi’s actions have caused a horrible burn in the pit of your stomach. Your guts are doing summersalts and your fingers are itching to relieve yourself.
You could totally-
“Oh, there you are!” A boxy grin greets you and it takes every ounce of will power to not scream.
What the hell has gotten into you? Since when were you so horned up? You seriously need to cool it.
“Yes, here I am.” You mask over the frustration in your voice and give Taehyung as much of a smile as you can.
“Everything alright?”
“Yeah, yeah...” you turn your attention to the fruit bowl, turning an apple with your index finger.
“Everything doesn’t seem alright. You jumped off of Yoongi Hyung like he was hot.”
“Yoongi is hot.” You roll your eyes.
“You know what I meant.”
“Everything’s okay, Tae, I promise.” You look back up at him and give him another smile.
He takes one proper look at your face and it takes a lot to not call you out. He knows that if you wanted help, you would definitely ask and you were obviously trying to ignore your whole situation. Your lips are bruising a little from how badly you’ve been biting them, your eyes are clouded and blown wide, your cheeks are gently flushed and so if the expanse of your chest from what he can make out of the skin peeking out of your shirt. You’re horny.
You suddenly feel as though Tae is eye-fucking you and you cross your arms over your chest, awkwardly turning away from him. Both of you have grown comfortable with one another. You usually send for Tae in your times of need (aka wanting someone to platonically cuddle with) because he has expressed no romantic interest in you. There’s no chance it could ever possible happen. So, you feel comfortable with him.
But right now, seeing only just a fraction of how you’d look being completely ruined, Tae can’t help but kind of okay really want to bend you over the counter and help you out.
He clears his throat.
“Okay well... if you say so.”
You hum in response and then turn to him again.
“The movie is kinda boring so I’m gonna chill out in here instead.” You announce, voice suddenly weak.
“Okay...” he barely manages a whisper and turns away immediately.
What the fuck was that?!
Did you just get eye-fucked by Kim Taehyung?
You slip into one of the cool bar stools and immediately there’s a burning cold running up and down your exposed legs. The plastic nips into your hot flesh and you sigh.
The clock is ticking behind you and you can barely make out the sound of people outside. There’s a good 30-40ft of distance between the frat house next door and so you don’t have to worry too much about their noise. It’s mostly quiet and the sun isn’t on this side of the house. The room is still bright, though.
Another sigh leaves your lips after a moment passes. Maybe it’s the coolness of the seat, but you’re finally feeling a little better. You definitely need to invest in finding more female friends.
~^*^~
“Psst.”
You ignore it. Just ignore it. Maybe he’ll stop.
“Pssst.”
Again, you pretend not to hear, jotting down another note.
“Pssssst!” A finger jabs into your side and you finally cave, head snapping to your right.
You come face to face with some coffee coloured orbs which are a little wide and sparkling in mischief (albeit a little regret after your angry face turns to him), he’s got mousy hair and plump-ish lips and holy shit he’s kind of cute. You don’t let your face falter, though. This is the first lecture of the year and he’s already interrupting and talking?
“Could I borrow a pen?” He whispers sheepishly, “I left my pencil case back home...”
You huff, not uttering a single word to him as you open your case and practically throw a pen at him.
“Thanks...” he whispers and now he feels bad. It was a genuine mistake, though! He got a little busy with Jimin and the PlayStation and before he knew it, he had like 20 minutes to get ready and get to class and it’s a seven minute walk from the frat house to this lecture hall so he only had 13 minutes to get ready and- he kind of left his pencil case on the kitchen counter, “...I’m Jungkook by the way.”
You don’t respond. He doesn’t say anything else until the lecture ends and he’s watching you throw things into your rucksack. It’s very cliche - and trust, he knows this - but you are the first girl who’s not melted at the look of him and he kind of likes that? He likes that you haven’t given in so easily.
“I’m sorry about all that,” he begins once people start to up and leave. You turn to him.
“It’s fine. Keep the pen.”
And you’re gone.
Jungkook spends the rest of the day thinking about you and he feels so guilty. It was the first day! How could he forget one of the two things that are going to carry him through his university. You can’t have paper without pen! Okay, that makes no sense but, he still feels really bad. So he goes out and buys this lowkey expensive pen as an apology and he’s super early the next day. He catches you outside and tugs you away from the doors.
“I hope you don’t want another pen-“ you snap at him.
“No, listen, I just wanted to apologise for yesterday. It was totally my fault and I’m sorry for making such a bad impression of myself. Here.” Jungkook has never done the whole gift-to-a-girl thing before so he just kind of thrusts you an unwrapped box. It’s a pretty pen. A muted metallic rose gold. It also comes with refills.
Oh. That was sweet. But you immediately realise how much this must’ve cost him and you decide-
“I can’t accept this, Jungkook.” You offer politely, reaching out to give it him back.
“Please, I really want you to have it. I felt awful after you looked at me like you wanted to bite my head off.” He rubs the back of his neck, unable to look at you for a moment. You ponder. This is a really sweet gesture.
“Alright,” you sigh, “but you’re not giving me a lot of choice. Thank you, Jungkook.”
“You’re welcome...” he trails off so that you can fill in your name.
“[First]. I’m [First].” You give him a smile.
Before you know where you are, you’re being pushed through the cafeteria by Jungkook and he’s screaming out “Hyung!” And then six different guys are all staring at you. Jungkook introduces you to them, sits you down next to the one called Taehyung and takes the biggest bite you’ve ever seen out of Namjoon’s sandwich. This happens for the next few days until you start to willingly accompany Jungkook.
~^*^~
Three years have passed since then and you are now sitting in their kitchen trying not to jump the bones of the next one that walks through the door.
You think about Jungkook back then. He’s always had a little bit of a baby face, but back then he was still a little lanky so it was more obvious. He had a pretty weak build. Obviously, since then, he’s been going to the gym like twice (sometimes thrice) a day because he’s earnt the nickname muscle pig. Somehow you also know that he’s gotten stronger because he can “hold an entire girl up with ease without needing any support” (it was also the worst sex he ever had, so he’d not done it since). Great. Now you’re thinking about Jungkook holding you up and-
No. No, you are not going to think about Jungkook like that. It’s bad enough you’re sitting in here avoiding the seven of them like the plague because you know that if you have to sit on Yoongi’s lap again you’ll end up riding his thigh like your life depends on it.
“Penny for your thoughts?”
Jimin’s voice rips you out of your thoughts about Yoongi’s thighs and you look up at him. He’s recently dyed his hair black and holy shit he is the epitome of sex on legs. He walks across the kitchen to grab a glass and turns to you for a minute.
“Hello? Am I talking to the wall?”
“Sorry,” you find yourself finally finding words, “bored.”
“There’s a whole Fast and Furious in the living room-“
“Yeah but it’s boring.”
“Tokyo Drift is not boring.”
“Yes it is. And the main character isn’t even hot so it’s not worth it.”
Jimin blows his teeth out at your response. Of course you wouldn’t want to watch a movie because the main character isn’t hot. He fills his glass with water and takes a swig.
“Well sorry he’s not Leonardo Di-whatever his name is.”
“First of all, rude, second of all I didn’t realise you guys missed my company so.”
“It’s nice having female company.” He wiggles his eyebrows.
“You’re disgusting, Park.”
“Not as disgusting as the girl who blatantly tried to ride Yoongi hyung’s thigh like ten minutes ago.”
He throws the words over his shoulder as he leaves the room and your face explodes in red. Shit. Okay. You need to leave right now if you want to save face. You pray to god that only Jimin saw because you cannot emotionally handle the guys making fun of you right now. You need to go home, get your vib and go to town for a couple of hours. You’ll feel better.
You almost jump off of the stool in your anticipation to leave. Part of you wants to go and say goodbye to the boys, but you know you’ll end up coerced into staying if you do. They’ll text if they worry about you.
Your feet are moving towards the front door and you pause just before you walk past the living room. The door is wide open (typical Jimin) and there is no way they won’t spot you. Round the back it is.
Who would’ve thought you of all people would be sneaking out of the frat house?
It’s not under the same circumstances as the other girls but, you’re still sneaking out and you still kind of feel like James Bond so it totally counts. The back door (as expected) is unlocked and you’re pleasantly surprised to see that the pool is actually covered. The boys have finally taken heed after two and a half years of you giving them shit for not covering it over.
You’re so close to leaving when you realise your fatal misstep in this whole mission. Your phone. It’s still on the sofa next to Yoongi. Fuck.
Maybe if you found a way to distract the guys and lure them outside, you could just rush back in and-
“What are you doing?”
The sass in the voice alerts you to who it is immediately. You literally don’t know how to answer him bevause your standing at the side of the house, looking out at the street that’s so close but so far away, nervously biting at your cuticles.
“I’m, uh, getting some fresh air.”
“Yeah, right. You can’t just leave, [First]!” Seokjin scolds and he’s pulling you back towards the back door.
“But I’m bored!” You whine.
“You let Jungkook choose the movie.”
“Yeah but he gave me his puppy eyes and an extra mini-cookie.”
The movie apparently just finished because Hoseok, Yoongi and Namjoon are standing in the kitchen. You can hear Jungkook and Jimin squabbling in the kitchen and you’re kind of a little too embarrassed to see Tae right now. None of them pay much attention to Seokjin or yourself as he scolds you for trying to leave without saying goodbye. You apologise to him before excusing yourself to grab your phone. You pass Jungkook in the hall and he grins at you.
“Hi baby,” he blows a kiss.
“Suck it, Jeon.” You playfully scowl and make your way to your precious phone.
You clutch it up and look at your notifications. Just a couple of snaps from Hyuna. Nothing out of the ordinary. Jimin is lolling on the sofa watching you. He knows he was the only member that saw what you were doing, and Yoongi probably didn’t even realise what was happening until you’d leapt from his grasp.
“[First],” he calls out.
“Hm?” You’re trying to act nonchalant.
“What the hell was that? With Yoongi Hyung.” His voice is a whisper and you draw yourself close to him.
“You don’t think anyone else saw, do you?” For a moment your mind flashes to Hoseok. God you hope Hoseok didn’t see.
It may have been pointed out by Jimin that you have a phat (with a capital PH) crush on Hoseok. Whilst that is certainly not true, it’s also not not true. You definitely have a thing for Hoseok but it’s not a crush, per se. There’s the obvious, first, that the man is fucking gorgeous in every sense of the word. He must’ve been sculpted by the gods themselves because no one should have a jawline that sharp, or a nose that perfectly sloping and pointed. And definitely not lips like that. Plump to just the right size and form the shape of a heart whenever he smiles. Also, the rest of him, his arms (which you notice he’s been working on lately. He came back after dance practise wearing a vest and you almost creamed right there - Jimin didn’t shut up for like a week), his hands, his fluffy hair, his legs, that slab of chocolate-shaped abs that you want to run your damn tongue over-
Okay you have a thing for Hoseok. But it’s only physical. Anyone would be crazy to not crush on him. He’s gorgeous. He’s a an absolute beauty of a man and with being a dancer, you can only imagine how much stamina he has.
But he’s also the most good-hearted person you’ve ever met in your life. He laughs so loudly, he smiles so brightly and it’s all so genuine. He’s always been there for the other frat members and for you whenever you’ve needed him. He’s gotten up at 3am to console a sobbing Namjoon after his girlfriend broke up with him. He’s gone to the gym to help a small and fragile Jungkook work on his personal goals. He’s sat with you for hours helping you revise for exams. He goofs off a lot and doesn’t care woo looks, but he’s not afraid to cry in front of his frat members and you. He finds the dumbest things funny and he’s also the biggest scaredy-cat you’ve ever met and he’s just so... so Jung Hoseok. Everything about him is so inviting from his raspy laugh to his sparking eyes. He makes you feel secure in being yourself because he’s definitely not going to judge. Hell, if someone can go to all of their lectures for a day wearing just a mankini because they lost a bet to the maknaes, they’re definitely not going to judge you for dancing on the kitchen counter to a little bit of the Rolling Stones.
He, of course, is a fuckboy, yes. He brings home a lot of girls. You’ve been over at the house when you’ve heard “oh god-! Hoseok! Oh~!” and felt that pang of whatever the fuck that feeling is whenever he brings a girl home. But you’d never ever go that far with him yourself. Hoseok doesn’t want a full-time relationship. He doesn’t have the time for it. At least, that’s what he’s told you when you randomly asked why he doesn’t date. And you don’t want to be just a fling to him. You want to be able to hold his hand and show him off because he’s the best guy in the world. You want to sit on his lap while he studies and run your hands through his hair and reassure him that everything is going to be ok when he’s stressing over the smallest things. You want to go with him to Hope World (his personal studio for his Producing class) and sit on that little couch with the flower plushy and watch him tack tack tack away as he works hard. You want to go places with him and just him and have him all to yourself always. But you definitely don’t have a crush on him.
“[First] did you hear a word of what I just said?”
“Huh?”
“What the hell are you thinking about?” Jimin launches a pillow at you and you manage to catch it.
“Nothing, what were you saying?”
“I was answering your question. I was the only one that saw you trying to get yourself off on Yoongi and I’m fairly sure he didn’t even realise himself but - why the fuck were you trying to get off on Yoongi?”
Hoseok is laughing at something Yoongi has just said when he remembers that he was in the middle of texting that cute girl from the club a few nights ago. He reaches into his left pocket and then his right and finds... well nothing. Where’s his phone?
He looks around on the counter and sees only Namjoon’s phone and Seokjin’s keys and shit he must’ve left them in the living room. He can hear Taehyung upstairs listening to his classical music. He’s probably studying or jerking off. Jungkook is no longer making a ruckus in the living room so he’s guessing it’s empty.
He excuses himself from the conversation and slowly makes his way back to grab his phone. Hopefully there will be another lacy surprise waiting for him.
“[First] did you hear a word of what I just said?” Jimin’s voice is hushed and low. Clearly he doesn’t want to be heard. Hoseok stops in his tracks. He pressed his back against the wall, standing right next to the arch where the door is. He doesn’t want to eavesdrop but he also doesn’t want to interrupt.
“Huh?” The confusion in your voice is evidence that you didn’t.
“What the hell are you thinking about?” There’s a sound. A soft ‘puft’ kind of sound. It reminds him of a pillow.
“Nothing, what were you saying?” Hosoek knows you well enough that he catches the breath of a lie twisting your words. You were thinking about something.
“I was answering your question. I was the only one that saw you trying to get yourself off on Yoongi and I’m fairly sure he didn’t even realise himself but - why the fuck were you trying to get off on Yoongi?”
Woah - back up. You were trying to get off on Yoongi?! During the movie?! Hoseok’s breath catches in his throat. He didn’t see you- yes he did. You were perched on Yoongi’s lap.... oh.
“Okay, look,” you sigh, defeated, “you can’t tell anyone this, alright?” Your voice lowers to a hush but Hoseok can still just about make out the words.
“Alright.” Jimin whispers.
For some reason, Hoseok feels really dirty. Maybe he shouldn’t be listening to this-
“I haven’t...” your voice trails off to a mumble.
“Huh?” It seems Jimin didn’t catch your words, either.
“I... I haven’t had...” again you trail away.
“Seriously, stop mumbling.” Jimin is growing a little irked.
“I haven’t had sex in over a year!” You hiss and Hoseok’s jaw literally drops.
“WHAT?!” Jimin leaps up and you smack your hand over his mouth. His eyes are swimming with genuine shock and your about to cry now that he’s alerted the entire street.
“Jimin!” You whine, “shut up!”
“Sorry-“ his mouth is muffled against your hand and it takes a strip of his tongue over your hand for you to pull away, “hope that didn’t turn you on more. If it’s even possible.”
“Oh shut up, Jimin.” You hiss, “it’s no big deal, obviously. It’s just getting to me a little. I’ll be alright. I just need to go home and have some... you know...” you look down at your feet. Oh god, this is awkward.
“I can always help.” Jimin wiggles his eyebrows.
“Help with what?”
You freeze up and Jimin looks like the heavens have just opened for him. His eyes light up and you’ve never seen anyone try to hold back such a huge, shit-eating grin.
Hoseok steps into the room like he wasn’t just listening to you confess you’ve experiencing the longest dry-spell of your life.
“[First] has a bit of a problem. Actually it’s a huge problem,” Jimin starts and your sending him a look of warning. But Jimin knows you’re so whipped for Hoseok so maybe if he just hints a little, he can get you some dick and some Jung dick at that, “it’s a real burning blunder. It’s a hot, hot issue, let me tell ya Hyung.”
“Park Jimin.” You warm quietly through gritted teeth.
“Oh yeah?” Hoseok’s grabbed his phone now and he’s looking between you and Jimin. You’re standing really close to one another and you instinctively step away. Hoseok wants to say that he knows what your problem is and looking at your face, he doesn’t know how it wasn’t given away much earlier. Fuck, you look hot with the need swimming in your eyes.
“Yeah. It’s a real peak of an issue, wouldnt you say? I bet it’ll be a pretty orgasmic feeling when you solve it.”
Never in your life have you considered murder. But right now? Yeah, right now you could smash Jimin’s coy smirk right into the fucking wall.
Hoseok wants to burst out laughing. He knows Jimin is teasing you and he can see the anger flooding your face. He pins that Jimin is trying to get him to catch on to your problem but he already knows. He figures he’ll have a little fun.
“Oh, by the way, [First], we’re going on a spontaneous trip tomorrow. Wanna come?” He’s smiling at you.
Oh god. Hoseok’s asking you on a trip? Technically it’s wil the others but your heart just skipped a beat and Jimin is certain that you’re going to cry out of happiness.
“I, uh, I don’t know I-“
“She’d love to!” Jimin answers for you, “you don’t have any plans whatsoever do you?”
You’re giving him such an evil eye that’s screaming ‘you know I have plans you evil fucking leprechaun-ass looking motherfucker’ and he’s giving you a look back that’s screaming ‘a date with your vibrator isn’t plans’.
“Great!” Hoseok is showing some serious enthusiasm, “you might as well stay the night, then. You have clothes here, right?” You nod in response, “cool. Well, now that I’ve got this,” he waves his phone about, “I’m gonna go jerk off or something.” He stalks out. Hoseok... jerking off... in the same house as you...
You now and swolloy a dry lump. Jimin has just sealed you in for at least another 24 hours of absolute no relief whatsoever. And now Hoseok’s gone and said that! You could kill Jimin.
So now you’re lying in the middle of Hoseok’a bed with Hoseok to your right and Jungkook to your left. Back to the Future is playing on the TV but only Jungkook is really paying any attention. It’s dark and the light illuminating from Hoseok’s phone is beginning to hurt your vision. You keep looking at his hands. They wrap around his phone easily and you wonder what he did earlier. If he did... you know. There’s a burning right at the pit of your stomach and the room is hot and you’ve got two of the hottest guys you know laying on either side of you.
Jungkook’s biceps are hard and his flesh is a little clammy and hot. His pecs are pushing against the material of his shirt and his basketball shorts leave very little to the imagination.
“Yeah but I saw it on a... rerun...” you can hear Marty McFly talking in the background but the blood is pumping through your ears.
Hoseok takes a look at you. Your face is red and you’re biting your lips. You’re drawing circles on your leg with your fingertips. Oh. You’re nervous. Hoseok turns, making a point to make a small little groan as he does so and you shift next to him. He’s facing you now but his phone is still in his hands. He’s tapping away furiously and you wonder who’s on the receiving end.
It’s most certainly a girl. It has to be. The only time Hoseok types so damn much on his phone is when he’s scolding one of the frat members for something and as Jimin, Taehyung and Yoongi have gone to another frat party and Seokjin and Namjoon have already gone to bed, you know that it’s not that. You eye him, careful not to out yourself. He smirks just a little. The light from his phone illuminated his face. How are his pores so small? And his eyebrows are so neatly kept. And his lips look so soft.
His eyes snap up to you and you are fast to look away. He smirks. God, you must be going batshit crazy right now. Hoseok isn’t narcissistic. He isn’t in love with himself like other people he knows coughjincough but he knows that he’s attractive. And he knows that Jungkook is attractive, too. And he knows that you haven’t had sex in over a year. He knows how hot the room is. He knows how little you all have on. He knows how easy it would be to touch you right now bevause Jungkook is way too busy watching the move.
But then he wonders if you’d make a noise. Probably given how blown out your pupils are right now. He can practically see steam coming off of your skin. He wonders how loud you could be. Would you scream out? Would you cry? What did you like?
Great. Now he’s getting hard.
‘Way to go, asswipe.’ He thinks to himself and lies back on to his back.
The last thing he wants is to press his cock into your side. You might just combust and he likes this bed. You peer over at Hoseok as he moves and hOLY SHIT HE’S HARD. You gulp hard and Jungkook actually notices.
“I’m gonna-“
You’re quick to push up and you clamber over Jungkook. Hoseok sees a damp spot on your shorts. Fuck. He’s getting harder and now he’s alone in a bed with Jungkook. This is really fucking weird.
“Jungkook can’t you fuck off? I wanna sleep.” Hoseok rolls to face away from Jungkook, placing his phone down on the nightstand. Whatever that Sara, Stacey, Sue - whatever her fucking name is - is saying is definitely going to be nowhere near as hot as what he’s just seen between your damn legs. You’re so fucking wet - how are you staying so composed?
“Can’t I watch the rest of this?”
“No.” Hoseok grumbles, “go sleep we’re taking a long drive tomorrow.”
Jungkook huffs loduly in protest but he gets up anyway and leaves the room.
You stand in the bathroom looking at yourself in the mirror. Your chest is rising and falling and you can feel your slick between your legs. It’s like a damn pool down there. What the he’ll is wrong with you?! Hoseok and Jungkook are your friends!
A few moments pass and you don’t return. Hoseok begins to think that maybe you aren’t coming back. Maybe you don’t feel comfortable sharing a bed with him but it’s getting cooler and he doesn’t like the chill biting at his back. He pulls himself up and he is straining against his shorts. Fuck. He makes his way out into the hallway. Silence except for the whir of the fan in the bathroom. The fan automatically comes on with the light so you must be in there. He moved towards the door. Maybe you’re feeling a little sick?
Hoseok nears the door and that’s when he hears it. Even the sound of the fan can’t drown out those small whimpers. Jesus. He presses his ear against the door.
“Oh my god.” You whisper. He thanks god for not fucking with his hearing. Your breathing is growing and your whimpers are slowly growing to be whines, “fuck,” Hoseok is biting his lip as he listens. He’s sure he’s rock hard until, “Hosoek,” you gasp.
Holy mother fucking shit.
Did you just-?
His name?
wHAT?
And now he feels 10x harder and he’s sure he’s never felt this hard in his life. Not even when that hot substitute in 10th grade had her blouse pop open because her breasts were just too big to not bust it open. Fuck. Shit fuck.
But then an idea pops into his head. He likes the game. He likes the chase and he wants to see how desperate you’ll get. Even when you were with Jackson, you were still kind of reserved when it came to sex. You’ve always been that way. Maybe that’s why you haven’t fucked any of the guys yet. And Hoseok kind of doesn’t want you to now that he’s heard you. He kind of wants you all to himself.
And so he knocks.
The noises stop immediately and your heart is thundering. You were so close! Just another couple seconds and you would have easily came. You freeze. Did they hear you? The pleasure isn’t really ebbing away. It’s just sitting there in your core, waiting to snap.
“Um, [First]?” Your face flushed a deep crimson. Why Hoseok?! Did he hear you?
“Y-yeah?” You try to sound normal, like your voice isn’t cracking, like you don’t want to burst into tears because you need to come so badly.
“Everything alright?” No. Absolutely not. You want to come. You kind of want him to come in and make you come. Over his cock.
“Yeah, everything’s peachy. I’ll be out in a mo’.”
“Alright.”
He stands there. He doesn’t know what to do now. He decides he’ll go in after you and maybe try to calm himself down after that. When the door eventually cracks open, you step out. Your vest is a little twisted and he realises he’s never seen you so exposed. Your chest is bigger than he originally thought. Why do you wear such tight clothes - you’re so hot! Your legs are long and gleaming. He wonders how they’ll feel wrapped around him. Your face is deeply blushed and your lips are really swollen now. How badly have you been biting them? Your eyes are sparkling with tears - just a little but Hoseok sees them. God, how pent up are you?
You look over Hoseok and the images that were in your head aren’t subsiding. He’s rock hard against his shorts. You think that’s he thinks because it’s dark you can’t see but Jesus Chris when it’s that big it’s hard to miss. You quickly look away and Hoseok coughs before stepping into the bathroom.
Anger is one emotion flooding your veins. You just need something. Anything. You don’t know when this is going to stop because you don’t know how long the boys plan on staying wherever you’re going. You should have left your dam phone here at the house and gone a night without it. It’s not like your laptop doesn’t have a link to your phone contacts anyway. God damn.
You clamber back into Hoseok’s bed and don’t bother pulling the covers up. Hoseok is gone for a while and you don’t know what’s taking him so long. What if he heard you? What if he’s gone to sleep downstairs? Dear god. Well that’s your friendship fucked with him. Oh lord.
If only you knew. His knuckles gripping the edge of the sink, his other hand being the reason for such an intense wave of pleasure coursing his veins. Thinking of the way his name rolled off of your tongue as you gasped for breath. Did you think about his tongue, or his fingers, or his cock? God he doesn’t care. Any of them will do to make you sound like that again.
And then there’s white coating the sink and dripping down and fuck. Hoseok’s never done that to the thought of you before. Now he has to get back into bed with you and act like that didn’t just happen.
He doesn’t realise how long he’s been until he pass back into the room. You’re facing the other side of the room but fuck. Your shorts have ridden up a little, your ass is exposed - since when did you have such a nice ass? Your curves are on full display since you’re lying on your side and when Hoseok moves around the bed to get into his side, your practically spilling out of your vest. Your lips are parted, brows a little furrowed but you look peaceful. All hints of the utter torture you’ve been enduring are wiped from your face and you look kind of cute.
You? Cute? Ew, no. You’re [First]. The dorky girl Jungkook brought to lunch a few days after he first started at the uni. You’re the sweet little thing that scolded Jungkook for eating half of Namjoon’a sandwiches in one bite. You’re [First] who always brings cupcakes on a Thursday and you always give each cake icing which is the favourite colour intended for its recipient. You’re the girl who brings extra pens just in case Jungkook forgets his again, and who dances with Jimin when he’s drunk and you just want him to not fall over again, and who reads to Namjoon when he’s sleepy. You’re [First] who somehow gets along with Yoongi really well and makes him laugh all the time, who sits with Jin and is the only one who sings “yummy, yummy, yummy I’ve got food in my tummy” with him when he’s cooking.
You’re [First] who showed up one day holding hands with a senior guy and who looked so in love Hoseok thought his heart was going to burst right there. You’re [First] who always brought Hoseok water and food to his dance practice, who visited him at Hope World to remind him to take a break. You’re [First] who once broke the coffee machine and went out the same day and spent all your wages on a brand new one because you felt so bad. You’re [First] who came crying to Hoseok first when Jackson broke your heart, who called him at 2am and just asked him to speak to you because you needed to hear someone’s voice and you always liked his for some reason. You’re...
You’re extraordinary.
Hoseok doesn’t realise that his hand is caressing your cheek until you melt into his touch. He pulls away as if you’re hot to the touch. What is he doing?
The next morning, you’re not there when Hoseok wakes up and he feels a little... deflated. It’s only about 7am and he decides to get up despite a little lack of sleep. He feels groggy. He feels a little ache-y. He’s quiet as he manuvers down the stairs. He knows that Seokjin is driving today and he doesn’t feel like waking him up early and getting a lecture.
There’s a smell coming from the kitchen and Hoseok quite literally almost has a stroke when he sees you pottering around the kitchen in his hoodie and your shorts (which the hoodie is covering so it looks like you’re wearing nothing but his hoodie). You’re making pancakes and there’s all sorts of toppings already lined up on the counter. When you turn, you give Hoseok a smile.
“Morning, Hobi!”
His heart flutters in his chest. All he wants right now is to kiss you. You look so good in his clothes... You’re smiling at him and the sun is bursting through the windows. You’re glowing. He can still see that subtle hint in your eyes where you’re burning up but it seems you’re pushing it back for the time being. Maybe you relieved yourself before he woke up?
“Morning...” he has to be honest, he’s a little... taken back. You’re not usually a morning person. He knows this because one time you slept over and you had an 8:30am lecture the next morning. It took him, Jungkook and Jimin to get you out of bed and then for some reason you decided to temporarily bond with him for the morning. He had to drop you off at class and you had a toothpaste mark on the corner of your lip, your hair was just pulled into a messy ponytail and you’d thrown an outfit together. You were glaring at anyone and anything that came within a 1m radius of you except for Hoseok. So seeing you standing there smiling with a spatula in your hand at 7am is most likely the most shocking thing he’s ever seen.
“I made pancakes.” You hummed, turning back to the stove.
“I can see...” he’s still a little tired and his voice is so husky. He looks so good right now with a little bit of a bed head and his eyes not quite as bright as they usually are. You pretend the heat on your face is from the heat of the stove and you laugh it off quietly. This is fine. You’re fine. Fine.
“Would you like one?”
“Sure. Why not?”
Hoseok is sure he’s never tasted anything this good in his life. You tell him that it’s your grandmother’s recipe and he makes a mental note to meet the woman who taught you how to cook so well. Right now, you’re seeming like the full package. Until Hoseok reminds himself that he doesn’t do relationships. It’s too hard. But then again, it’s you. He’s looking at you again and you’re not looking at him. You’re currently overloading your pancake with syrup and he doesn’t know how you can intake so much sugar so early in the morning. He doesn’t understand why his heart is threatening to burst open his chest but he scoffs down his packcake so that you’ll make him another. It’s not long before the other members start to wake.
~^*^~
“-WHEN I’M WITH YOU ALL I GET IS WILD THOUGHTS!” The chanting around you has you shrinking further into your seat. Not that it did anything, you have Taehyung on your left and Namjoon on your right. Hoseok is sitting right in front of you with Jimin on his right and Jungkook on his left. Yoongi is in the passenger seat and Seokjin is driving.
Taehyung is trying to get you to dance with him in the very limited space and you’re trying to become invisible. Hoseok is laughing and you swear your heart is leaping into your throat. Why did you agree to this again? Oh, right, you didn’t. You’re burning a nice hole in the back of Jimin’s leg when your phone makes a noise.
From: Jimin ‘stop glaring at me’
To: Jimin ‘I wasn’t’
From: Jimin ‘I can literally see you in the mirror’
To: Jimin ‘in that case it’s just my face’
From: Jimin ‘no it’s not. Especially when you’re looking at Hosoek it ISNT’
To: Jimin: shut it Park
Jimin turns and gives you a flash of his smile and if you were close enough you would have hit him. Taehyung gives you a curious look and you bat him off.
“White girl wasted on brown liquor! I probably shouldn't be around you! 'Cause you get wild, wild, wild! You looking like there's nothing that you won't do!” The boys are still belting out the lyrics, but Hoseok’s head turning to lock eyes with you makes you nearly whimper. Fuck. He knows.
You don’t know how, it’s not even that logical that he would know about 1) your fat crush on him 2) your current horniness levels being through the roof 3) your want to ease your horniness with your big fat crush - so why are you panicking?! Jimin wouldn’t have told him. Jimin is an asshole, but he knows when to stop. He wouldn’t tell Hoseok. You hope.
When you pull up to this gorgeous summerhouse, you’re blown away by the scenery that surrounds it and well, the house itself. So much so that Taehyung has to pull you out of the car.
“This is technically Seokjin’s parents’ but they only use it for like two weeks in July so it’s ours for the rest of the year.” Jungkook explains and you nod at his words. You look around and Hoseok, despite being in a conversation with Seokjin and Jimin, is staring right at you. You look away.
“We could totally skinny dip.” Taehyung muses.
“You seven are more than welcome to engage in said sausage fest. I don’t feel like getting algae in my vagina.” You roll your eyes.
“Strictly speaking, you can’t really get algae in your pus-“ Namjoon is stepping over now.
“Why are you guys talking about [First]’s pussy?” Oh, there’s Hoseok, too. Great.
Please, lord, just let a small [First]-sized sink hole open up right under your feet and KILL YOU.
All seven members are now debating on if you can actually get algae in a vagina and you’ve literally never felt more uncomfortable. Hoseok is laughing at the chaos he’s had a hand in causing and your heart constricts alongside the bubbling, angry pit in your stomach. A pair of ripped denim shorts, a huge oversized white t-shirt (so large that he has to tuck it in to the front of the shorts so that it doesn’t look like a dress), an orange cap and matching vans. He looks... hot. As usual, in line with every other Jung Hoseok ™ look, he is so fucking hot.
Instead of standing around with the boys, you venture inside for a while. The house is very spacious but there’s only four bedrooms which means that everyone is going to have to bunk up. Apparently Seokjin normally gets a room to himself so he’s a little disgruntled at having to share a bed with Yoongi. Jimin is quick to pick Taehyung to bunk with and Jungkook decides he wants Namjoon because “Namjoonie Hyung sucks at switch games” which means... you’re bunking with Hoseok.
Holy shit you’re bunking with Hosoek.
You honeslty don’t know why you’re freaking out because you’ve slept (not like that) with Hoseok before. You guys like to cuddle every now and then and sometimes you’ve just straight up told Hoseok you’re sleeping in his bed because it’s really comfy (he has a memory foam mattress). Many times you’ve woken with his arms around your waist, nose pressed into the crook of your neck. But right now, something feels different. It feels like... like something has shifted monumentally between you and Hoseok. You’re starting to think that he really did hear you last night. You’re starting to think he knows you have a crush on him and you feel so stupid. There’s no way he likes you back so now you’re stuck with having to share a bed with him.
The first day is quick to pass as you get to the house at like 2pm. Seokjin whips up lunch and you guys sit out the back, looking at the large pond/small lake that sits at the back of the house. It’s a relatively warm day and it goes by pretty quickly. Before you know where you are, you’re lying in a bed next to Hoseok. It’s dark and your shoulder is touching Hoseok’s because somehow you also got stuck with the small double. Apparently it’s “too sexual” for two guys to share a bed and be that close but you know it’s bullshit because Jungkook and Taehyung literally compared dick sizes by whipping them out and holding them side-by-side. How is that- you know, you don’t even want to venture into that anymore.
You don’t know if Hoseok is asleep next to you. His chest is rising and falling but his breathing is a little too fast for someone who’s sleeping. He also keeps fumbling with his hands just a little and you’ve slept next to him enough to know that he stills when he’s officially asleep. Even so, you refuse to call out to him. But... he’s so close. And you’re beginning to burn up again. Oh god why now? Why next to Hoseok? Which reminds you, you need to smack Jimin when you see him tomorrow. Making you lie in this small-ass bed with Hoseok of all people, fully knowing how physically pent up you are. You find yourself rolling over, turning away from Hosoek and gulping in a breath. You are t h r o b b i n g. Since when had you become so hot? Before you know where you are, your fingers are over the material of your pyjama shorts and you’re biting into the pillow so that you don’t make a sound.
Fuck. This is so wrong. This is so so wrong. But you can’t help yourself. 13 months you been in this hell-like state. 13 months you’ve suffered. Your body can’t handle it any longer. You know how wrong this is. Getting yourself off with Hoseok lying beside you. Your friend Hoseok. Heavens above, you know he’s a sex god. You’ve heard more than your fair share of his sexcapades and you know girls don’t cry out like that if the sex isn’t great. You have a great mind to just roll over and beg him to fuck you. But you can’t. Because it. is. Hoseok. Because you know you’ll never live it down and you’ll definitely end up crushing on him more if he fucks you good. Your fingers are working at your bundle of nerves and oh, Lord, you’re close already. Can you come like this? Is this as needy as you’ve gotten? You’re willing to come for the first time in like four days sleeping next to one of your best friends/crush?
You don’t get the chance. Hoseok rolls over, grunting a little as he does. His arm tangled around your waist and he pulls himself close. He hums in your ear. You freeze. Your fingers are digging down into your core. Your eyes are wide open now and your heart is beating so quickly. Hoseok doesn’t make any further movement. He’s sleeping.
Except he’s not. He knows exactly what you’re up to and you are not about to come right next to him like that. Even with the pillow muffling you, you’re still a little loud and whiney. He’s smirking as he listens to your racing heart and your rugged breath. He’s pinning your arm against you and he knows you won’t move now. You’re trapped like this until he really does fall sleep. You’re trapped with your fingers on your cunt, so close to coming and nothing gives Hoseok bigger pleasure than knowing you’re shut down again. How much further will you need to be pushed before you crack?
The next day, you wake after Hoseok. He’s already up and you find him outside bending open the open bonnet of a red car. It’s a Golf R and you’re not entirely sure where it came from but Hoseok seems pretty busy so you sit down on the porch steps and wait for him to notice you. He’s gone with some ripped jeans today and a white tank top. His muscles flex every time his arms dip in and out of the metal and you’re flushing already. Get a grip, girl, it’s only 8:45! Hoseok turns after a while and flashes you a smile. Then, he’s calling you over. You don’t think that you can stand but you push yourself up and make your way towards him. {Part 2}
#bts#bts x reader#bts x you#bts smut#bangtan smut#jhope#jhope x reader#jhope x you#jhope smut#hoseok#hoseok x reader#hoseok x you#hoseok smut#hoseok x reader smut#jung hoseok#jung hoseok x reader#jung hoseok x you#jung hoseok smut
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hey you crazy kids, it’s me, ya girl LARA. bringing in my fave gorl, the friend who wants to comfort you but has no idea what she’s doing, the girl who wanted to compliment you but accidentally insulted you and now doesn’t know how to fix it, who regularly says “ thanks, you too ” to ticket salesmen at the movie theatre tell her to “ have fun ” ... GEETA ( aka gee, greta, saint geeta... )
( NAOMI SCOTT, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ) you’ve probably already heard of GEETA HARRISON through the LA music scene. the TWENTY-THREE year old is the BASSIST & CO-LEAD SINGER of the band SHY VIOLETS, an INDIE POP band that has FOUR members & sounds kind of like GROUPLOVE, FICKLE FRIENDS & THE KOOKS. GEE is said to be DEXTEROUS but also CONFRONTATIONAL. i wonder what bandslam makes of them ?
( tw: drunk driving, car accident, death )
— ✧ HISTORY
your first memory is her laughter. years later it still rings in your head, it resounds against the walls of your chest. it’s still in you. the sound of her voice as she cradled you, sang with your head against her chest. you still don’t understand the language, but the soft hums and vibrations tell you that you are oh, so wanted. oh, so loved.
your parents are DAVID and SAMIRA. your parents were young and in love. your parents were broke. your parents moved to SAN FRANCISCO and started a band. you weren’t planned, but who cares about plans anyway ?
you are born from their music. you sprout from the fingertips that caress the piano keys, or strum the guitar. they name you SONG, in your mother’s native tongue ( GEETA, GEE-TAH ). you were always meant to make music. to BE music.
you never knew silence. there was always MUSIC, always beautiful harmonies filling the air and flooding your lungs. the beatles, the stones, hendrix, joplin, dylan, bowie. you don’t listen to the radio. you only know your father’s records, and your mother’s voice. the strum of his guitar. her fingers on the piano keys.
you turn TEN years old and you hold a guitar for the first time. he teaches you his favorite songs, which are also yours. you don’t have a lot to talk about, but you have THIS. this is the ONE thing you can share with your father, and you take to it like a duck to water. you were B O R N from music, like athena from zeus’ head. you were ALWAYS meant for this.
school lets out, and you run to the music store. you make music for the people, take advantage of the instruments on display. you learn how to play on borrowed keys and strings. there isn’t a MOMENT when you’re not playing, or listening, or making music. at school, you write, at home, you practice. this is ALL you know.
the first time you hold a BASS guitar in your hands you’re FOURTEEN. you feel as if part of your body has been missing until this very moment. it’s a tan-colored stratocaster, and it feels like coming HOME.
the summer after you turn FIFTEEN, you’ve got your eyes set on a seafoam green fender. you work all summer. you don’t see your friends. you bring her home and name her PENNY LANE.
in high school, you join every band that will have you. you just want to play music, you don’t care about the genre. you NEED to play. at home, you write your own songs, but you keep them to yourself. one day, they’ll find the right outlet.
you’re EIGHTEEN and almost out of high school when some drunk asshole C O L L I D E S with your mom as she’s driving home one night. they rush her to the hospital. you’re hanging out with your band after a show when you get the call. your father is holding her hand as she takes her last breaths, moments before you come running in. you’re too L A T E.
you almost don’t graduate. you stop playing. you stop writing. you live with your father in complete silence. for the FIRST time, there isn’t a sound. not a note, not a hum. the next year passes by in a foggy blur. suddenly you’re NINETEEN and nothing has happened. you haven’t moved an inch.
your dad has moved on. you don’t understand how. every day he walks further, and further A W A Y from you. you hoped it would be the other way around, that this would bring you closer. isn’t grief supposed to do that for people ? instead, he finds someone else. you were so used to seeing your parents together, so used to thinking that they were the ONLY people out there for each other. it doesn’t make sense in your head for your father to be putting a RING on someone else’s finger.
now, you have a stepmother. she’s sweet, but she’s not your mom. you let her know. don’t let her fool herself into thinking she’s a replacement. you have SIBLINGS now. around your age. they’re nothing but STRANGERS to you.
one day, you sit down at the piano your mother used to play. it doesn’t sound the same as when she played it, each notes bouncing off the walls of the apartment you grew up in, but it kind of feels like she’s still THERE. your dad starts crying. there’s a moment of understanding. this is where your paths diverge. he’s MOVING with his new wife and kids. there’s a baby on the way. you realize you need to move too. this isn’t the same apartment you grew up in. you can’t STAY here.
the next day you pack your things and drive to LA. you don’t have a plan yet, but you’re not too worried. again, who cares about plans ?
a friend lends you his couch. you get a job at a music store ( those have always felt like home, no ? ). you two find your own place. you work a few different jobs, teach other kids how to play music. you find your way around the scene. make some friends who play in bands. you join a band called SHY VIOLETS. you’re back to playing the bass, and you feel like you have a home again. everything is finally making sense. THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE MEANT TO DO.
— ✧ PERSONALITY
❝ she didn’t sob or wail. her grief was horribly discreet but as persistent and almost as silent as bleeding from an unstitched wound. ❞
ZODIAC SIGN: aries-taurus cusp ( april 20th ) PERSONALITY TYPE: estp – the entrepreneur ENNEAGRAM: type 8 – the challenger TEMPERAMENT: melancholic HOGWARTS HOUSE: gryffindor MORAL ALIGNMENT: true neutral PRIMARY VICE: pride PRIMARY VIRTUE: diligence ELEMENT: earth MORE STATS HERE !!
hello kids this is geeta aka gee, my sad, awkward, fighty gorl.
at first, she’s kinda quiet and reserved. she has a one-track mind, and the only thing she cares about is the music. she wants to be the best bassist she can be. the best singer she can be. make the band the best it can be.
she lives and breathes music. it’s what she grew up on, it’s the only thing she knows. doesn’t really understand people who aren’t as passionate about music as she is. can be a little closed-minded when it comes to this. she honestly just doesn’t do anything that isn’t music-related. definitely needs to learn how to relax and get a life outside of the band. music is her life; she doesn’t care about anything else.
she’s pretty great at what she does and she knows it, so she can get cocky sometimes. she’s very proud of the band and what they’ve achieved, and sometimes that can go to her head. but the truth is she has the chops to back up her talk.
she’s stubborn as a mule and that definitely shows when dealing with the band. she knows what she wants and has trouble compromising. shy violets is all she has so she’s fiercely protective of it, and extremely loyal to her bandmates.
she doesn’t trust people easily, so she’s very cautious when making band-related decisions. who they sign with, where they play, etc. she’s kind of a control freak.
she’s a generally friendly person, but she doesn’t open up easily and plays things close to the vest. she can come off a little cold sometimes, but not rude. just awkward. her communication skills are shit.
she’s only comfortable enough to be emotionally open with a few select people. or, of course, through the music she writes.
she can’t back down from a fight. it’s a problem, and she knows it, but she can’t avoid confrontation, she runs headfirst into it, even if she’s in the wrong. mama didn’t raise a quitter, but she did raise a fool.
she’s always listening to music. she’s that – *planet explodes* *removes one earbud* what – meme.
she doesn’t really drink, partly because she’s a control freak, and partly because she’s still spooked by what happened to her mom. she’s not very comfortable around drunk people, unless she’s also a little tipsy. she’ll drink just enough so that the people around her don’t think she’s weird, but she’s always the sober friend at the end of the night. she’s always the designated driver, even if she wasn’t out drinking that night. she’ll get out of bed to drive the drunk children home. she’ll do this without being asked, but she’ll still complain about it the whole car ride.
a bicon™ because i’m a firm believer that straight people don’t exist.
you will all learn soon enough that my specialty is sad girls™ and this is. only the first. it’ll only get sadder from here on out.
— ✧ EXTRAS
BASSIST CLAIM: laena geronimo from the like. VOICE CLAIM: greta salpeter from the hush sound. THEME SONGS: way it goes – hippo campus | some nights – fun. | don’t take the money – bleachers | drive – pale waves | some nights – fun. PINTEREST: xx PLAYLIST: [ always a wip ] xx
— ✧ CONNECTIONS
i’m probably gonna work out a page for these, but in the meantime, i’m just gonna list some general ideas in case anyone is interested !!
your character and geeta grew up around each other in san francisco, and they moved to la around the same time. they sometimes drive up there together [ taken: open 0/1 ]
your character was the first new friend gee made when she moved to los angeles. still very raw from losing her mother, she opened up to them. they know her better than most people [ taken: ricky clark ]
your character is the friend gee crashed with when she first arrived in los angeles, and later got an apartment with. they still live together, with all the ups and downs that entails [ taken: nathaniel taylor ]
your character is a big influence in geeta’s music, she probably saw them live a few years ago and is absolutely blown away by what they do musically. she admires them greatly, and really looks up to them [ open 0/1 ]
your character is geeta’s best friend. her platonic life partner. 10/10 would die for them without thinking twice. they sometimes makeout a little too [ taken: jade vandermeer ]
your character worked with geeta at the music store [ open 0/?? ]
your character and geeta dated shortly after she moved to la. it didn’t last, and they both realized they were together for all the wrong reasons. they’re friends now, but not after writing some angry breakup songs about each other [ taken: nathaniel taylor ]
your character and geeta dated for a while, but it didn’t end well. not necessarily messy, but awkward. she does everything in her power to avoid them [ open 0/1 ]
your character and geeta dated for a while, and they were really into each other, but that kind of fizzled out. they’re still friends though [ open 0/1 ]
your character and geeta hooked up once. it’s nbd [ open 0/?? ]
your character is someone geeta kind of hates. maybe she doesn’t hate them, but she’s kind of grossed out by them. the last person she would ever expect to hook up with, but hey, she did. and now they won’t let her forget it, because it’s so easy to get under her skin [ open 0/1 ]
your character and geeta aren’t in the same band, but often get together to jam out, or write music together. throughout this process, they bond and learn a lot about each other [ open 0/1 ]
your character and geeta almost dated once. almost. something happened that made them reconsider [ open 0/1 ]
your character has a crush on geeta, and she doesn’t even notice. perhaps it’s better this way, since she can’t return the feeling and wouldn’t know how to turn them down [ open 0/1 ]
your character and geeta don’t really get along. they’re always trying to one-up each other, always trying to beat the other one. they don’t hate each other, but they’re constantly competing [ open 0/1 ]
your character has geeta’s phone on speed dial for when they’re too drunk to go home. they crash regularly on her couch [ open 0/?? ]
your character is someone geeta’s had feelings for some time, but still hasn’t acknowledged. they’re good friends, so taking that next step feels impossible. they’re someone she can open up to, and her feelings are getting harder and harder to deny [ taken: ricky clark ]
#❛ ɪ ᴡɪsʜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍʏ ʟɪᴘs ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴜɪʟᴅ ᴀ ᴄᴀsᴛʟᴇ ❜ ( muse )#scene:intro#drunk driving tw#car accident tw#death tw#just covering my bases here
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I posted 704 times in 2021
96 posts created (14%)
608 posts reblogged (86%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 6.3 posts.
I added 1,142 tags in 2021
#burdened with glorious queue - 356 posts
#art - 241 posts
#lovecraftiana - 112 posts
#yog-sothothery - 101 posts
#dreamquesting - 85 posts
#star trek lower decks - 65 posts
#pacific rim - 57 posts
#au - 44 posts
#kaiju - 41 posts
#monsterverse - 40 posts
Longest Tag: 132 characters
#(but yeah out of the modern treks that have aired so far lower decks is the only one that feels like star trek for this very reason)
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
Potential Fanfiction-y Interspecies Compatibility Issues That Aren't Sexual:
"So I saw the doctor today, and it turns out the reason I've been sneezing all the time is because I'm allergic to you."
"Dude, I have someone coming over in half an hour but I completely forgot they can't use the same kind of chairs as me, you gotta help me figure something out before they get here!"
"I'm so happy to have been invited to visit your family, but there seems to have been a communication failure because my species is completely incapable of consuming and processing any of the food they've set out for me and I don't know how to tell them that without seeming rude"
"The way my species expresses casual affection is impossible/highly uncomfortable for yours so it looks like we'll have to come up with something new!"
Alternatively, "The way your species tends to show affection is usually interpreted as an insult among mine, so wow this is awkward."
"Your species is nocturnal and mine is diurnal; do we really like each other enough to fuck up our sleep schedules for this relationship?"
"I like you a lot but living in your atmosphere/gravity would literally kill me, why does this always happen?"
30 notes • Posted 2021-03-12 14:52:15 GMT
#4
So I've downloaded this free constellations app on my phone because, y'know, I like stargazing but never have any clue what I'm looking at because I know jack shit about astronomy or astrology.
Anyway, my new hobby is fucking around with it and finding the Absolute Worst Constellations I can. So far, I have found:
TRIANGULUM
Literally just a big ol' space triangle. Anyone can draw a triangle between three stars. You're not special, Triangulum. The image overlay isn't even the same orientation as the star triangle, so nobody's winning here.
FORNAX
See the full post
31 notes • Posted 2021-02-09 18:58:44 GMT
#3
'Formerly-reasonable character falls for chaotic bastard and is made more chaotic and bastardous through exposure to that person's chaotic bastard found family' is an oddly specific ship dynamic, and yet I've gone for it twice. Once for a show I don't even watch.
46 notes • Posted 2021-03-26 08:59:20 GMT
#2
A Short List of Songs that Jaskier, Court Bard and Consort to the White Wolf, Warlord of the North, has absolutely performed the AWAU's versions of in the Great Hall of Kaer Morhen:
The Mariner's Revenge Song
Moby Duck
Oak & Ash & Thorn
Yarmouth Town (after Ciri's gone to sleep, of course)
The Last Seskatchewan Pirate
Hoist Up the Thing
Honourable mention goes to The Courtship of the Mermaid, which gives me very strong Jaskier vibes but which I don't think would translate into a medieval fantasy setting and still be funny, and Lillibulero, which would not get the Geralt Seal of Approval due to its inclusion of devils (not a thing) and misogyny (should not be a thing), although Ciri would probably enjoy hearing about the farmer's wife murdering her way out of the underworld.
(@inexplicifics, I submit these for your consideration)
85 notes • Posted 2021-02-07 12:44:42 GMT
#1
So, the King Lear On The Continent AU (AKA, the one where @inexplicifics' Warlord Geralt keeps getting dragged into everyone else's petty political bullshit, and Cordelia has rather complicated feelings about her terrible family):
The thing is, Cordelia is not a politically savvy woman. She isn't cunning as her sisters are, cannot play the games of flattery and falsehood that will allow her to survive. What she is is observant. She listens, she talks to people, and she knows that in the Wolf's lands the people have well-kept roads and well-stocked stores, the peasantry can afford to change their clothes, there are no unscrupulous nobles diverting the wealth of their people into their own purses. And in the Wolf's lands, the exiled third daughter of a senile King from a country that few people even remember exists might have prospects outside of a whorehouse or gutter. Might even have a chance to save her family from themselves.
The court sorceress, Lady Miranda, is young and naïve, barely more than a student, and cannot reconcile Cordelia's unjust banishment with her image of Lear the benevolent, the just, the noble, but Cordelia has always counted her as a friend, and so whilst her father professes not to care where she ends up, be it desert or marshland or the bottom of the sea, Miranda hears her request to be portalled to Wolvenberg.
In Wolvenberg, she steels herself, squares her shoulders, tries to capture that same indomitable spirit that runs through her sisters, and that once ran through their mother too. And she walks into the closest inn - the Griffin's Eyrie, and scans the interior. There's a group of Witchers drinking in the corner - she's thought they might be there, if they're anything like her father's soldiers - and she strides up to them, trying very hard to ignore the fact that she is very young, and not very skilled in self-defense, and these men are very big. And she drops to one knee, and begs them to escort her to the Wolf, where she might request sanctuary. She's expecting them to leer or look down her dress or...well, she's not really sure what else and doesn't want to know either, but the point is, they don't do any of those things. One of them gives her a hand and helps her up, and his companions finish up their drinks, and nobody seems at all suspicious of her motives, and isn't that peculiar? But now is not the time to be unpacking all of that.
She spends three days with the four Witchers - Griffins, she learns, on their way back from a hunt - who continue to treat her courteously and not very much like her father's soldiers at all, before they finally reach Kaer Morhen and she is brought before the White Wolf, Warlord of the North, and hopes that behind that unreadable expression is a heart that will see fit to help her. She tells him about her father, his failing mind and growing ego and the way she and her sisters - sharp-tongued Goneril and volatile Regan - grew up, always competing with each other for his love and attention, the way he has now left himself at the mercy of two women who have no reason to love him back, raised with the knowledge that they will never be as good as sweet demure Cordelia and faced with the sight of him casting aside even her, and she begs him to please, help her fix it, because she knows she has every right to resent him and she does but she still doesn't want him dead and her sisters will show no mercy.
As she speaks, she feels rather foolish for daring to think that the most powerful man on the Continent would listen to the pleas of a disgraced ex-princess from a nowhere-country, but when she is finished he hmms and retreats to speak with his Council. And Cordelia is lead away by a young woman in a blue-and-red silk dress, who introduces herself as Milena and offers to help her clean herself up.
In the end, the decision is made that the Wolf will not invade Cordelia's former homeland (and she's relieved at that), but that he'll lend her a small force, comprised of eight Griffins, to provide numbers and Lambert, to speak for the Wolf and guard her and Milena, who is apparently his wife (or something like that, Cordelia isn't sure) and whose presence will hopefully make it clear that this is very much not an invasion (and also to stab anyone who gets too close to Cordelia and shouldn't be there.)
Cordelia's terrible family end up gathered in one of the council chambers, and Cordelia gets to work, with her escorts staring down anybody attempting to object. Her father has formally abdicated the throne and isn't in a fit mental state to re-ascend anyway; she asks his cousin if he'll be willing to host the old king at his estate, and that's that problem taken care of. His cousin, whom she's always called 'uncle', is just as short-sighted as he is, but he's loyal and trustworthy and will ensure he spends the rest of his days in comfort.
Finding someone to take the throne is a little harder - her father has no sons, neither of her sisters can be trusted with that much power, and she herself is certainly out of the running - but her uncle's eldest son is of royal blood and is a truly good and responsible man. He's almost as naïve as she once was, but his brother is anything but, and although he's technically illegitimate, giving him a title and land of his own ought to keep him loyal enough to the new King that he'll make a decent advisor. Both her sisters would have been far happier in the military, but there's nothing Cordelia can do about that, and so she requests that they be given advisory positions too, and her father's former chief advisor, blunt and honest, to appoint anybody else necessary and keep them in line.
Cordelia herself cannot stay in the kingdom, although now-King Edgar has rescinded her banishment. She cannot remain in court after bringing the Wolf's forces upon the country, and she cannot bear to stay with her father after his treatment of her (she loves him, but she does not like him especially much, after all of this), and so she returns to Kaer Morhen. And...it's good, is what it is. Witchers can smell lies, it turns out, and so people are honest in a way her father's court rarely was, and she makes friends quickly - Milena, Oliwia, Aleksander, Jaskier... and maybe they haven't found a real job for her yet, but she can sew and spin and sing a little bit. She'll make a place for herself here somehow, and she'll work through her complicated mess of feelings eventually.
It's going to be alright.
No, really.
94 notes • Posted 2021-02-03 19:18:53 GMT
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Save Me
Requested imagine
You had been caught in a position where you couldn’t move, as it turns out an after school trip to Delmar’s wasn’t the best idea today. You stood in the back of the store, grabbing ahold of a sweet tea, Delmare talking to some of the customers that would walk in, “Y/N, this young gentleman just paid for your tea!”
Delmar’s voice rang through the store, but when you walked to thank the man, you saw him holding a gun to Delmar. You dropped your tea, hearing the can bounce up and down, but then explode onto the floor, “on the ground now!”
Delmar didn’t move, but you did as the man said, dropping to your knees, putting your hands behind your back. You had to find help, thinking of ways to get a signal out or even call out for help, you thought through your options, screaming wasn’t one.
The man had a comrade walk in, you couldn’t see their faces, they were hidden behind masks, muffling their voices and preventing you from seeing their faces. “Open the register. Now!”
The man moved the gun up to Delmar’s head, he didn’t react, keeping a smug look on his face, but the partner thought quickly. He huffed and walked towards you, putting the gun to your head, Delmar’s facial expression changed almost quickly. He looked towards the register, you shook your head lightly, but soon he unlocked it, letting the man take the cash inside.
There were only 3 other people in the room, a woman with a small child around her hip, she hid him behind her, hoping she could protect him from the two armed shooters. The other was a young girl in the back, you recognized her from the school, she had only been a freshman, you pulled out your phone silently, setting it inbetween your legs, having to impossibly twist your neck to see.
You put your finger on the home button, but taking it off quickly, allowing it to go to the passcode screen, you clicked emergency. A white screen popping up quickly, you dialed 911, putting the phone back into your pocket, you may not hear them, but they would sure hear you.
“Excuse me sir. Don’t you think it’s kind’ve rude to rob someone of their livelihood.” One of the men, specifically the one in white turned to look at you, anger spread as he continued stuffing his bag. “I’m talking to you.”
The man finally turned to you, dropping his bag and walking to you, but his comrade grabbed him by the shoulder, “we aren’t hurting anyone.” He shook his hand off of his shoulder, “I won’t hurt her.”
You gestured towards the door, the woman and child close enough to get out. She understood, “you’re hurting someone as you rob Delmar’s gas station. This is all he has.”
The one in blue turned to you, Delmar shook his head, knowing what you were trying to do,it was obvious, your phone was glowing in the back of your pocket.”Keep your mouth shut little girl.”
He put his foot on your chest, looking you in the eyes he had green eyes, “did you know only 2% of people in the world have green eyes, even if you do make it out, it won’t be hard to find you.”
He pulled his foot back, pushing force into the kick, it hit you hard in the chest, knocking the air out of you, you hit the ground, the stinging now erupting out of you. “What’s that?”
They both walked over to your phone, in which you realized it flew out of your pocket, and was now near the freezer. Police sirens echoed in the distance, you smiled as you watched the mother and teenager run out.
You sat up, seeing that the man in white had your phone in his hand, his mask off his face. He wasn’t to bad looking, but he had a large scar on the bottom of his jaw spreading to under his eye. “What have you done?”
He walked over to you, grabbing you by your arm, dragging you, he threw you against the freezer. Your vision now blurry due to the hit you took on your head, “I’m going to kill you.”
His face was inches from yours, he held up a fist, pulling his body back and putting all that he had into that one blow. You fell to the ground, your vision beyond blurry, pain surging through you. “We have to get out of here. The police are gonna be here any minute.”
“Surely you aren’t gonna leave your own crime scene!” You recognized that voice, Peter, your boyfriend, aka, Spiderman.
Your eye was to swelled up to see anything, but you knew he would get you out in a few minutes. After a series of grunts and movements, you felt your body being picked up, “Spiderman?”
“Yah, it’s me..”
“Are we leaving?” You felt your body being sat down, some of your vision returning but it was mostly black and bubbly, “Not yet, I gotta leave a note for the police.”
You couldn’t help but smile at how cute he is sometimes, after 3 more minutes you were picked up once again, now moving to a different area, you didn’t know where but you knew you were safe.
“Hey, baby, wake up.” You sat up quickly, Peter was sitting down at your side, wearing a pair of sweatpants but no shirt. The right side of your face stung, hurting to even move it, “He punched you hard…”
Peter looked down in shame, feeling bad for not being able to protect you, you put your hand under his chin, causing him to look up at you.
“I love you.” Peter smiled, pulling a first aid kit from the dresser, you had used it many times to seal up or nurse him back to health. He pulled out a cotton ball, soaking one half of it in peroxide, he looked at you before putting it on your head, “This is gonna sting.”
He tapped the cotton ball on your eyebrow, moving all around your eye, he made sure to do it carefully, trying to make sure you are okay. “You look beautiful..”
He kissed your forehead, you could still tell that there was pain in his face, he always wanted to make sure you were okay, never to get hurt. He set down the cotton ball, having to pick up another one, you didn’t realize that there was that much blood, but Peter took care of it like he was a certified nurse.
After he cleaned the wound on your head, he pulled out a large piece of gauze, using surgical tape to stick it over your eye. You could now only see out of one eye, Peter couldn’t help but laugh at how you looked. “You look like a sexy pirate.”
He pulled you into him, laying a kiss on your forehead, you smiled happily and spoke to him, “thanks for taking care of me baby. But next time, let’s not have it be me.”
“Next time, neither of us should get hurt. I’m going to keep you safe”
#peter parker headers#peter parker headcanons#peter parker#peter parker imagines#tom holland imagine#tom holland#the avengers infinity war#the avengers imagine#avengers#the avengers
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